To Instagram! So if you’re still following switch it over to Instagram… rdvgarcia26
The hubby is on his way back in for a week. Though I am excited to see him, I’m worried ill go back to eating crap food. I’ve been doing pretty good at getting the veggies in, but the hubby doesn’t do veggies.
As for fitbit, I did pretty good yesterday. Almost made my goal! I was about 600 steps away. Lets hope today will be better.
I don’t have time to make vids. What am I thinking. Geez woman! Lol.
So I’ve had fit bit for a few days now. Think it’s about time to work at goals. First goal: 10000 steps. It’s the default goal which I haven’t been able to hit yet.
First day of July!! And it’s raining out this morning! Feels like this is gonna be a great month. One more day and its vacation!
That is all.
Been hanging around YouTube a lot this week. Catching vids from the few that are still around when I was actively making vids. Makes me want to get back into making videos. Maybe? Maybe not?
Got myself a fitbit yesterday. Haven’t set any goals yet. Just gonna see where the numbers are on a normal day and go from there.
Last night had a huge serving of enchiladas, homemade of course. And got a bloated feeling afterwards. It continued on all night. Couldn’t even sleep comfortably. Woke up this morning still feeling bloated. Can’t even really fit into my work pants today. I decided to weigh in today, which was probably a huge mistake, but I felt like I needed some kind of starting point. WHAT WAS I THINKING!?! The moment I got off the scale I got that feeling, that “gun-ho” feeling. Like it was all or nothing. I’ve had this feeling many time before, and like before I think about extreme measures and then by the end of the day I give it up and go into a binge eating frenzie. Got some juices this morning thinking I’ll have nothing but juices all day. But I started having hunger pains so I decided to get me some TacoBell for lunch. I havent reached the end of the day yet, but if lunch is any idication of it, its gonna be bad.
Back to the scale. I’m at 220. I had so many emotions when I saw the numbers. I was sad that I’ve gotten so big. Mad cuz I let myself go so much. I dont know what to do at this point. Okay thats a lie, I know what to do but I just want a quicker way to do it. I know I need to come to terms that there is only way way to do this and its gonna require a lot of hard work and effort. I’ve done this before and I can do it again. I just need to actually do it. I need to quit replaying it in my head and just do it already. I dont know what I’m waiting for.
I feel like I need to flip the switch, I just cant find the switch.
OMG. Feel like such a fattie today, woke up and didnt fit into any of my work clothes. Then I tried to push my feelings aside, had a protein shake for breakfast. Didnt really think about lunch, when it finally came around I was feeling a bit upset over this morning. I ended up with a double with cheese, bacon, fries and chili. And yet I still feel horrible. Its a vicious cycle. I need to get a hold of all this.
I’ve got to plan my meals like I used to. I used to be on top of it. I know I can do this, I’ve just got to do it.
So I just typed and extremely long blog entry and decided to draft it cuz it went off into some dark place and made me realize a few things about myself. I can be a bit of a control freak, lol. Basically my entry started off with wanting to lose weight and ended in the realization of coming to terms with things I can and cant control. So one thing I can control, what I put into my body and what I do with my body.
So yeah I lost weight in the past and have somehow, okay I know how, gained it all back and then some. But thats over and done with. Its in the past. Gonna move on and the only thing I can do is live in the present and live for the future.
It’s 10:30 pm and I’m tucked in bed, watching Law And Order. It smells like rain and the fresh air is coming through my window. It’s a little bit of perfect right now. 😊
They did come back on but my entire post is gone.
Nothing I can type is as good as action. Think the gods are trying to tell me that.
So today pulling out the bike. No run scheduled. Windy as hell. Dogs need some exercise, hope they dont fly away. :/
ON WITH THE HEALTHY!